How To Attract Guys

How to attract guys humor post valentine's day

I wanted a Subway sandwich.

I was out shopping with my mom. The adrenaline that comes from wildly spending money, mixed with perseverance to find a bag that looked like a Givenchy Antigona without the cost, left me famished.

We found ourselves in the mall.

“Do you want Subway?” I asked, stepping into the line.

I’ll be honest. My mother had no choice. My stomach lead my heart, and my heart led my feet, and my feet led me to Subway. It was basically the plot line of every romance novel ever written.

How To Get Over Heartbreak

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It’s sad when things end.

An empty box of Cheez-Its. The last episode of your favorite vampire-romance TV show. The conclusion of love month. The end of a relationship.

We mourn and cry and remember the good times we had. But no amount of tears will bring back those precious cheesy-salty-crackery moments you had together. You can’t relive the awestruck shock over your TV love’s heroic sacrifice. You can’t go back in time. Soon, you’ll have to move on.

My Valentine’s Day 2017

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My two greatest fears on this earth are deep waters and heights.

Generally, people will listen to these declarations and sympathize. She’s had a bad pool experience as a child, they think. Or, she’s 5’2 and used to being close to the ground.

Never have I met someone who took these facts as a challenge. It should’ve set me on high alert when he turned to me and said, “exactly how scared of heights are you?”

For The Love Of Pizza

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The first kiss bite.

Teeth sinking deep into soft doughy crust, a slight crunch on the finish.

Now, the cheese. Ooh.

The cheese is the best part. Warm, savory, salty, sensual. The slight tang of tomato sauce seeps out and explodes flavors of garlic and oregano across your palate.

Love, An Uncontrollable Bodily Function

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My home church has decided to embrace February with X’s and O’s. They have, cringingly, declared it Love Month, a phrase they proclaim with sentiment in their hearts and a sigh in their voice.

When I first heard the term Love Month, my stomach lurched for a bucket, a feeling—I realized—quite similar to love: an uncontrollable bodily function, repulsive to the people around me. Sounds about right.

I hope you’re not eating as you read this, because we’re going to talk about love. Got your bucket handy?

7 Ways to Approach Valentine’s Day

7 ways to approach valentine's day humor post

Valentine’s Day is almost upon us, and it’s possible that you don’t know what to do with this information.

Should you cry? Should you panic? Should you go out, buy a puppy, put a big red bow on it and stage a massive “OH MY GOSH. Look what my BOYFRIEND got me for VALENTINE’S DAY!” performance in the middle of the park.

You can wear a red dress. The couples on their little romantic dates will turn and applaud and tell you what a lucky girl you are.

Or, you can pick one of these seven different ways to approach Valentine’s Day.

3 Last Minute Valentine’s Day Treats

3 last-minute valentine's Day treats

I have the biggest sweet tooth, so any excuse to indulge in my sweet tooth is welcome.

Valentine’s Day sang to me in glorious tones, sprinkles, pink frosting, chocolateee, Rebekahhh, come neaarr.

Here are three last minute Valentine’s Day treats you can crank out if you’re going to a party, making dessert, or want to give someone a sweet gift.

Valentine’s Day Fashion Lookbook

Valentine's Day Fashion Lookbook

Valentine’s sparks an array of creativity in girls’ clothing, no matter what kind of day their guy has planned. We want to look cute and feel cute and show we cared to make ourselves extra pretty for that special someone.

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post on date ideas. From these have birthed three different outfit choices; a casual look with a Valentine flair, a cute and flirty look perfect for a picnic or movie, and a romantic date night look.

I’ve also teamed up with Emily from thecoloradoblonde.com, who’s created the three different hairstyles featured in the lookbook today.

And yes, every one of these outfits was bought or given to me secondhand.

Heart Tip Valentine’s Day Nails

Valentines Nails 420

Valentine’s Day strikes inspiration for the cutest nail art. Though, as much as I would love to hand write love you forever, to the moon and back, with all my heart, and then some. No really. Honest! on each of my individual nail beds, I can’t.

Instead, here’s a nail art tutorial that doesn’t require any special tools but the nail polish in your drawer.

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DIY Valentine’s Décor (Mason Jar Vase)

Valentines Mason Jar

The week approaching any national holiday is when I suddenly get the urge to decorate. I knew a lady once who decorated for every holiday, event, and season, and I fear it made a big impression on me.

I see a lot of cluttered up boxes marked “FALL STUFF (I think. .)” in my near future.

And I really just had the urge to paint something. This DIY was so much fun.

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