There’s something I love about the word insanity.

Insanity. Psychotic. Crazed.

Losing their minds.

I will use these phrases in humor, story telling, general description of human beings. . . I’m obsessed with the over-all declination of the human psyche. It’s fascinating.

So anyways. When my friend, Amy, turned to me and said she needed to create a line-graph based on her personal, every-day life, I smiled and said, “do one called My Levels Of Insanity Based On The Time Of Day.”

Insanity can be described as many things.

The overwhelming inclination to break the law, for instance.

Declining dessert.

Or that moment when you finally snap at your boss and tell her what you really think about the way she runs her business.

Or, it could be wearing heels to Disney Land.

Whatever the case, I describe insanity as the mental breaking point where any realm of self-control is a complete impossibility.

MY LEVELS OF INSANITY BASED ON THE TIME OF DAY

8:00 AM

Notes: No coffee. No food. No bathroom break.

INSANITY LEVEL: 1.5 — Zombie Mode

8:13 AM

Notes: Family members are acting chipper.

INSANITY LEVEL {SPIKES}: 7.8 — IT’S MORNING! DESIST WITH THE HAPPINESS!

12:00 PM

Notes: Eating lunch alone. Watching Friends. Drinking my afternoon coffee.

INSANITY LEVEL: Docile. — Not on radar.

4:00 PM

Notes: Late for                  .

INSANITY LEVEL: 9.0 — Get in my way and I will DESTROY you.

8:00 PM

Notes: Not on record.

INSANITY LEVEL: 174.94 — Let’s go to IHOP, and then ice cream, and then frozen yogurt. And then let’s go see a movie. And then come back to my house. And watch another movie. Who’s up for tacos? Oh. My. Gosh. ALL NIGHTER! YESS! THE SKY’S AWAKE! SO I’M AWAKE!

12:00 AM

Notes: Lying in bed. Makeup on. Shoes still on.

INSANITY LEVEL: 0.1 — Maybe I’ll go to bed without washing my face… Just this once…

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My assumption is that different people are more insane at different times in the day.

And don’t get me started on the days of the week.

• MON: “Complete sloth mode.”
• TUES: “At least Monday is over.”
• WED: “Partial insanity—beginning to plan the insanity for the days to come.”
• THUR: “Wait. The weekend doesn’t start after Wednesday?”
• FRI: “Insanity building…”
• SAT: “Complete psychopath.”
• SUN: “WHAT ARE RESPONSIBILITIES?!!”
• MON: “Sloth mode.”

What are your levels of insanity based on the day, week, or amount of caffeine in your system?

I find this incredibly fascinating.

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