“Hey. You okay? You seem a little off.”
“I’m fine. Just losing my mind.”
“Oh good. I was afraid it was something serious.”
HOW YOU KNOW YOU’RE LOSING YOUR MIND
1. When you start calling your boyfriend “Fred”… and his name isn’t Fred.
2. If you’re constantly walking into the bathroom and doing that double-take, “what was I doing in here?”
3. If you talk to your pet constantly.
4. When you yell at someone for interrupting a conversation you were having with yourself.
5. If you’re still standing in the middle of the bathroom, watching yourself in the mirror and saying, “I’m in the bathroom. What was I going to do in the bathroom? Hmm…”
6. If you’ve Tweeted “TGI FRI-YAYYYYYY!!!” on a Thursday and made everyone mad.
7. When you accuse a family member of stealing the food off your plate, while chewing on said food.
8. If you’ve thought of something really funny and burst into laugher at the worse possible time.
“We must remember to keep Mrs. Mary in our prayers. As you all know, she had a terrible fall yesterday and was rushed to the hospital. . .”
9. When you’ve been talking and talking and talking and suddenly cut your monologue with, “wait. What?”
You could’ve given away your first child and you have no idea.
10. When you get in the shower, half clothed.
11. If you make strange facial expressions as someone speaks, because instead of listening, you’re thinking about the time you went to Disneyland when you were nine, “and was that when I lost my favorite pair of sunglasses?“
I hope I’ve cleared any doubt in your mind that you still are in possession of your mind.
But if you’re too far gone, don’t worry about it.
We’re all a little mad here.