The Blogosphere is a beautiful place. Neighbors are friendly and encouraging (as long as you keep to appropriate hashtags). Backgrounds are white. And there are always fresh flowers. Everywhere. Long stemmed and vibrant in porcelain vases on the breakfast nook.
The Blogosphere smells good, like Bath and Body Works mixed with the smells of home. In the Summer, it smells of watermelon lemonade. In the Fall, it smells of pumpkin spice and leaves. But nothing beats the smell of the Blogosphere in Christmas time. Mmm…
This place is a community. We each pull our weight, and we pull together. We sit in a circle on folding chairs and pass The Talking Stick around. We listen and respond and are never harsh.
We’re all in this together.
The Blogosphere is always neat. Immaculate kitchens, sparkling bathrooms, made beds, DIY projects hanging on the walls. The interior design will always be a reflection of that seasons’ color scheme.
Blogosphere inhabitants live in one of three places: the beach, the city, or a white-walled bedroom. We seem to understand this isn’t as varied as it should be, but it makes for the best photography, so we’re happy.
The food in the Blogosphere is by far the best. The kitchen is regularly stalked and overflowing with delicious fruits and vegetables that look so good, even you will eat them. Bread is baked fresh in the oven every morning, and it never makes you fat. Coffee is at the ready, complete with cute, Instagram-able mugs.
And the lighting. The lighting is perfect. It’s never gloomy in the Blogosphere. Natural light floods every room. Your skin glows. Your hair glistens. You can read for hours and hours.
The Blogosphere sounds like jazz music and laughter as we munch cookies, sip tea, and discuss the latest Twitter chat.
We can throw a heck of a party.
Brainstormers are the only things that ever break in the Blogosphere. When they do, we grieve and wear black. We bake homemade Pinterest casserole and make house calls. And soon, the Brainstormer will be pumping full-speed again.
Basically, I want to live in the Blogosphere. I want a wooden desk, and a vintage watch, and an apple desktop with the analogue clock on the screen. I want to have donuts and croissants every morning and not gain weight, and for an afternoon snack, I’ll have fancy yogurt in an Aeropostale bowl, and the toppings will be half sliced strawberries, a quarter granola, and a quarter blueberries. I’ll eat outside on my porch overlooking the ocean while my dog curls up at my feet.
The funny thing is, we know this world doesn’t exist! We know our bathroom has splatters of toothpaste, the dog’s been rolling in weeds, clouds block the sun, and all the stuff that was on the now-clean desk is littering and scattered across the carpet.
Are we frauds? It’s all a sham, yet we all do it. I do it. (Don’t lie, I follow your blog.) You do it.
Perhaps we all just want to be a part of this beautiful imaginary community, and no one wants to break the magic.
I can accept that.