Getting Your Own Way

Sometimes, when the worlds are out of alignment and God says no, a monumental life-change occurs: you don’t get your own way. 

INSERT SHOCKED FACES I STOLE FROM THE INTERNET.

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The last girl is my favorite. Her face screams: HOW DARE I NOT GET MY OWN WAY! (She’s obviously used to the latter.)

When we don’t get our own way, our true selves reveal themselves.

The Bible actually talks about this in James 1:2-4, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” 

The Bible just makes sense. When you don’t get your own way, it is a test — of faith that God’s got it under control, and perseverance to wait on Him, and plain maturity to not fall on your hands and knees, slapping the floor, and screaming at the top of your lungs, “BUT I WANT IT!!”

Monday, I didn’t post on my blog. Monday, I was not getting my way. 

My brother docked in Long Beach yesterday, so we’re down there now, spending time with him before he leaves again. I’ve kept calling it a trip around the world, but he’s gone to China and back. As if that’s not cool enough?! We picked him up yesterday at the gate. He came out wearing a beard, a hat, a torn black shirt, and jeans that looked as if they were black as well. He was stained with grease up to his elbows. 

But anyway. I was scheduled to work yesterday. I had to switch shifts with a girl for Monday, which was no big deal. I just didn’t plan on waking up in the middle of the night in pain, taking Advil, and spending the rest of the time trying to not get sick to my stomach. I was wondering if I should call in sick, but I wouldn’t even know how to do that. 

Time came around to go to work. I was able to eat most of a bagel and was feeling okay. While eating the bagel, I realized my mom hadn’t come out of her room all morning. 

I self medicated at work with Advil and tums and water and doing chores to get my mind off the pain. It was fine and people were mostly friendly.

I had told myself that all I had to do was survive work. Then the rest of the day would be spent doing fun stuff. And who notices pain when you’re having fun?

My mom and I planned on going to our nearest Salvadorian Papusaria, pigging out (actually, that was my idea. My mom’s too much of a lady to “pig” out), then going to the mall to window shop, and smell the new Autumn collection at Bath and Body Works just to tempt me to buy a candle, and maybe even get my ears pierced at Clair’s.

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Totally kidding. Just my seconds. Not my fifty third hole. 

Then, I was thinking that the mall was so inspiring and so close to Walmart, who knows where we’d end up on our little adventure? And we had the rest of the day free to do whatever we wanted. No time restraints!

I came home to find my mom sicker than I was. 

Long story short, we didn’t go out at all. 

The adult in me said, “Rebekah, it’s not the end of the world. You can do it some other day.”

The child in me said, “But we’re going to be in Long Beach Tuesday and Wednesday and I have something every OTHER day this week. And I can’t wait until NEXT week. I want to go NOWW.”

Of course, I’m not thinking that my pain and nausea is still going on in my own body. All I’m thinking is that there was an obstacle in the way of my plans and thus I had to go out even more.

What do you do when you have plans to go out and they don’t happen?

Do you take the time to catch up on homework? Writing? Cleaning? 

I pout.

In my head, I know none of that stuff would’ve happened anyway, if my plans had just gone through. So since my plans didn’t go through, I still don’t need to do chores or school work. I practically planned a day off without knowing it. 

I don’t take this with a smile, though. I take it with a “now I have nothing to do like the loser I am” attitude, and I’m a joy to be around.

I’m wondering if I’m the only one who does this. Who rather feel sorry for myself by doing nothing because my plans fell through, or does everyone else simply fill in the time doing other fun or responsible stuff?

Of course, I pouted more because I didn’t blog in the morning since I thought my day was going to be a way more exciting topic to blog about. And they day turned out to be a bust.

I watched hours and hours of YouTube until I realized “Not Getting My Own Way” was a great topic to write about, then I couldn’t put my thoughts together to write a coherent post. I made myself eat Top Romin and went right to sleep.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds…” I obviously wasn’t considering it a pure joy, when this happened. I wasn’t being mature and faithful that God was in control. The rest of the chapter talks about asking for wisdom in your times of trial. Lord knows, we need wisdom. Wisdom to know what to do and what to say and how to think about the situation. 

I hadn’t realized my blog post idea corresponded with the Bible study lesson we had a week ago, so it just worked out. I hope that these verses encourage someone out there.

Or maybe just put a smile on your face, whenever that horrible day does occur and you don’t get your own way.

 

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