The little black dress. Ooolala. Sounds so romantic, doesn’t it? The little black dress. It’s supposed to be for those serious dates (don’t ask me what I serious date is, though, because I have noo idea.) or for a night on the town. The little black dress is supposed to look good on anyone. Make anyone curvy, mysterious, attractive.

Um . . . right?

So where can I get the one that makes me curvy, mysterious, and attractive?

I have two black dresses. And the only thing they have in common, aside from being black, is that I’ve never worn either in public. And so far, neither dress can achieve the three quotas of the perfect LBD, but they get close.

I bought this one three years ago. That’s three. Uno, dos, tres. Three years ago for a dance that ended up being cancelled, and I’ve never worn it in public. I’m sure you can see why. It isn’t exactly something you can wear to school, or church for that matter. And you’d think after three years (and three inch high heels) I’d finally be tall enough for it. I don’t know if you can tell by the picture, but the train drags on the floor. If I back up, I step on it. Cool looking? Yes. Klutz proof? Noooooo. I tripped so many times, I had to scoop up the train in one hand just to walk across my room and turn on the stereo. Not exactly safe for a night on the town.

Since I have dark hair, I have to be careful when I wear dark colors or else I look Gothic, and that’s not really my style. And this dress straddles the Gothic/elegance line. It’s really pretty on top. You can’t tell from the picture (sorry, I’ve been using my phone. I can’t find the cord for my camera), but the bust is sprinkled with sequins, then there’s black ribbon underneath the sequined part with a bow in the middle. But then there’s the long train part that’s just there, like something out of “The Munsters”. Did someone get carried away?

A while ago on Yahoo! news, there was an article on how Vanessa Hudgens was so creative because she took a pair of scissors and cut her dress exactly like mine; short on the inside with a long covering type thing over it. It became a fashion hit (apparently. I honestly didn’t read anything more about it afterwards). But I thought that it only comes to show, “everything’s already been said once.” In a depressing way, that means no one’s original. But anyway, back to the dress, I’m just not loving it, even if it was a fashion hit back, who-know’s-when. (Is it still popular?)

Anyway, LBD #2.

Quite the difference, ain’t it? After seeing my first dress, this one looks boring, poor thing. But the material is amazing.

Closer look so you can kind of see the black, flowery design

I don’t know what the material is made out of (and I’m too lazy to get up and check), but it’s very thick, and there’s a lot of it. I think it’s three layers; an under layer, a solid black, and then a gossamer type with a black floral design on it.

This one’s definitely elegant and very modest; not to mention, comfortable. The first dress is made of this very thin, silky-type material that almost sticks to you, showing off even the curves you don’t want to show off. But this one drapes across your body and is more flattering I think. (And I got this one at the thrift store for two dollars, if memory serves me correctly.)

But which is right for a night on the town?

I’m thinking dress #1 works for a kind of cocktail party event and dress #2 for a classy dinner. But can either of them pass for the perfect LBD? I’ll leave it up to you.