Aww, Mother’s day. The day to show your mommies how much you really care and love and appreciate what they’ve done to make you into the great person you believe you are. Think about how truly messed up you would’ve been if your mom never stepped in to help gently shove you onto the path of greater society. Yes, you owe her. And the best way to show your thanks? A breakfast fit for a queen. Obviously.

       So! My mom had found a recipe somewhere on how to make a sort of egg-toast thing. Basically, it was a sunny side up egg in the middle of a slice of bread (where the center had been cut out to make a circle for the egg.) And that was the extent of my knowledge. Oh, no. I also knew that the bread was toasted-looking and that she put salt and pepper on it. Now, that was the extent of my knowledge. But it seemed simple enough, right?

       I started off using a circle cookie cutter to make the hole (that looked a little big to begin with. Oh well.) then I tried to spread butter on the rest of the bread. The bread fell apart. That was a bust. I tried again. This time, buttering it first and then cutting the whole out of it. Better.
         Feeling somewhat proud of myself for fixing a problem so quickly, I plopped the holy bread in the pan and poured egg in the center. The darn egg leaked out from underneath the bread. What’s up with that?! I could almost hear the egg whites laughing at me; “nah, nah, nah-nah, nahh.”
         The second time, I pressed the bread down for a little while to contain the rebellious egg. That worked, but then the egg wasn’t cooking all the way and the bread was beginning to burn. I didn’t know what else to do, so I flipped the whole thing, which I was trying to avoid. It isn’t as pretty when you flip the egg as opposed to having the egg cook perfectly in the center. But burned toast and perfectly cooked egg aren’t exactly harmonically balanced.
         I experimented a couple times (with each of my family’s egg-toast things), and finally, I think I got the hang of it. You butter the pan, not the toast, and don’t wait for the bread to crisp before adding the egg. As to making the egg cook faster . . . I never really figured that out. Just about all the toasts were burned.
         To top it off, my older brother, who had been making bacon this entire time, had made them “chewy” (which no one likes) because he thought my mom liked them that way. . Yeah, she doesn’t. She likes them crispy. So, in a rushed attempt to make some crispy before she came out, he burned about four of them.
         My fruit salad was bound to redeem us, right? I chopped a couple apples, washed some grapes, cut strawberries, and added bananas. As a bonus, I even put strawberry yogurt in it. Doesn’t that sound delicious? Well, “I” thought so.
         The first thing my mom did when she saw the bowl was to use a spoon to poke around in the pink mixture. Her face was kind of a combination of confusion and disgust. “Um, who was the one who thought of putting yogurt in the fruit salad?” Heh, not me. .

         Happy Mother’s day, mama.